Book Review: Church Refugees

It's unfortunate, but it happens. It happens all too often. It happens right under our watch. It happens right in front of us but we usually don't notice, or deny that it's happening, but it does. People. Leave. Church. Yes, that is right, folks leave the pews. Sometimes they leave to start a new mission nearby or perhaps a new form of ministry, but people are leaving parishes and congregations. We can deny it but a sociology of religion professor colleague of mine always reminds me that data doesn't lie.

Josh Packard, together with his research assistant Ashleigh Hope have written a short but very good book on the "Dones" as they call them, folks who are done with Church. This is a play on the recent Pew Religion report that speak about the new wave of Millennials and Gen-X'ers who say that they have no religious affiliation. The media have labeled them the "Nones."

Dr. Packard is a professor of sociology at the University of Northern Colorado and co-director of the Social Research Lab. Ms. Hope is a graduate student at Vanderbilt University and one of Dr. Packard's former students.

Packard and Hope focus their attention on the Dones, the people who were once very faithful, very generous with their time, talent, and treasure, but as the word says, are "done" with Church. At least done with the institutional Church. These are the folks who attended prayer meetings and Bible studies, folks who volunteered for committees and worked with youth groups, but for numerous reasons are done with their local parishes and congregations and done with the institutional Church. These are not overly angry people are bitter, but they are tired of either being yelled at, scolded, or cajoled by clergy and lay leaders. They are tired of giving endlessly yet not being appreciated or affirmed. I guess many of these people are burned out on Church, at least with some aspects of Church life.

A short book review cannot delve into the numerous details which this book provides. However every pastor in ministry needs to read this book since it highlights many reasons why folks leave. Some of which are:

1. Not being valued by their pastors and lay leaders.

2. Being scolded about their Church attendance or lack of giving (One person said that they were even called up years after they left their congregation and the Church was soliciting a donation from them!!!)

3. Being overworked

4. Not being listened to

5. Being scolded and judged

There are more reasons too, but these are the basic ones.

While reading this book I felt sad, sad for those who left, sad of the good things that could have been done if these people stayed.

One would hope that both pastors and lay leaders, seminary faculty and national Church boards could read Church Refugees and learn something. We cannot fix everything that is broken, so much which is broken is systemic to institutional life in general, but we can, take a few helpful hints from Church Refugees and at least be a place of generosity and welcome, a place where folks can find the balm of Gilead and find both holiness and wholeness.

I congratulate Dr. Packard and Ms. Hope for conducting this research and for writing such a fine book. I hope clergy will read it and take heed. There are still folks in our pews and parishes who maybe are on their way to being done with Church, but their not done yet, at least not for now.

For more information about Church Refugees click here 

Book Review Preaching in My Yes Dress

There is a debate in publishing regarding books that are marketed for for a female audience vs. a male audience, the debate largely revolves around covers. Some folks argue that book covers with overly "feminine" themes like beaches, wine glasses, or the like are marketed more towards a female audience than a male audience. Perhaps. I don't know enough really to chime in. However, my hunch is that if Jo Page's new book Preaching in My Yes Dress: Confessions of a Reluctant Pastor (SUNY Press, 2016) was in a window rack at a bookstore few men might be inspired to purchase a copy, after all how many men walk around with an orange dress on the cover? 

Yet don't let an ongoing debate fool you. Yes Jo Page is a minister. Yes this book deals with the ups and downs, trials and tribulations of a woman pastor. Yes this book has a dress on the cover. And yes, this book is worth reading, especially if you are a pastor and have been one for a long time. 

For years Jo Page has served various Lutheran parishes in upstate New York. She has an MFA from the University of Virginia and is a regular contributor to the Albany Times Union newspaper. 

Preaching in My Yes Dress provides the reader with short vignettes from her life. We see her a young girl who grows up Catholic to a woman who seeks ordination in the Lutheran Church, to a woman and mom of two young girls trying to navigate the pastoral life and still maintain a normal family at home. 

I found her life to be intriguing since she is not one of the many pastors who think they have the "God-thing" settled, as in a deep certitude. No. Jo Page is a pastor with a healthy amount of doubt, even questioning why she became a pastor in the first place. One of the funniest chapters is when she meets a mom at a band concert at her daughter's school. Here we see two women, two Christians, yet so very apart from one another, one a woman pastor who is trying to live authentically and a mom who seems to know it all, I found myself chuckling out loud because I have met plenty of people like this in my life. These are the folks who has God in a box. 

While Jo Page is a fine writer and the book is worth reading I kept wondering why she didn't go deeper into her own life? I felt that she skimmed the surface a bit, providing some details but keeping the rest of her life hidden. I wanted to know more about why she became a pastor, I wanted to know more about her marriage and why she got divorced, I wanted to know more about her struggles in the parish and at seminary. I realize that she probably wanted to protect her former husband and former parishioners but one can do this and at the same time provide some background and context to her life. One of my writing teachers always said that one has to dig deep into the marrow of life, allowing the pain and darkness to reach the surface. I thought Ms. Page could have gone deeper at parts. 

If you are interested in the ups and downs of a parish minister then this book is for you. 

For more information about Preaching in My Yes Dress click here 

For Jo Page's website click here